Too many pieces of advice? Learn how to navigate through them
Aira Hoxha, 7-th grade
Advice from your best friend all day long…advice from the online world….advice from parents and family… advice from everybody and about everything. The world never gets tired of whispering pieces of advice all around. And the middle of the mess of these unnecessary tips and suggestions, here comes the most stupid one “listen to your heart”, pretending to not impose their way of thinking on you while in fact doing the same.
Anyway, we are still social animals, and “social” implies that we need to listen.
My solution in the overwhelming world of tips, suggestions, pieces of advice? Look for the most useful one. And the most useful that comes to my mind right now is something like that: ‘You can’t control the wind, but you can adjust your sails.’ My mother, (like Mother Mary in Beatles’ song that my father always listens) once said that to me. I claim to have comprehended the very meaning of this figure of speech, although I am still doubtful about it. Every time mother Mary reminds that saying, what I listen is “It’s not about what happens to you, it’s about how you react.”
To paint a background and give you a bit of context that relates with this modest piece of advice, I will start by saying that it has definitely changed my life (or was I, perhaps, about to change and that metaphor put word in my thoughts? Whatever, I will always be thankful for it.) The story goes back to the year 2023, when my so-called best friend, the person I trusted most and shared my “me” time with turned her back on me in the ugliest and unexpected ways. Gloomy did I become, in low spirits, all year along. The envy of this child spilled so much made-up dirt that all my school friends were put off me. To make matters worse, a few of them started picking on me at school, at events, on any occasion and even social media.
It was a very long and sad school year. Once, I shared my concern with Mother Mary (in case my real mum reads this!!!). But differently from the famous song, she did not say “Let it be”. She opened a book she had just closed to listen to me and cited: “My dear, you are growing up and soon you are about to set sails in the vast and deep waters of the ocean of life, where there will be nothing to meet the eye. Winds will blow hard, and you might get afraid of your boat. But, you know, the great sailors like Columbus did not try to control the wind. Instead, they worked hard to adjust their sails”. Mother Mary’s words were such a relief. Columbus did not go to India, and I did not see my childhood friend again, however Columbus found the New Brave World and I got a new lease of life lying ahead of me
Words of books in the music of you mum’s voice are the most useful advice. The magic worked for me. I changed!
I started ignoring every single reaction and body language of bad people and gave them the silent treatment, no matter how hard they tried to draw my attention. Eventually, bad people got bored and left for good.
To this day, I’m living peacefully, facing difficult situations effortlessly and have become a person with a stronger mindset, all thanks to this advice. In the end, who knows what I would do without it.
For the dearest reader who might think I have been dragging on and on, I will give the finishing line of this article: the most useful advice always comes from the wisdom that pours through your mother’s lips and whispers. We just need to learn to listen.
Elbasan,
in the scorching summer of 2024
